Grief

Grief!  What a word.  Let me define it: a response to a loss of someone with whom you had formed a bond; an emotional suffering one feels when someone the individual loves is taken away; a reaction to any loss.

For most of us, this is an area that we feel very unprepared for.  To grieve is to feel out-of-control; lost; and even selfish.  We struggle with the idea that it’s important to grieve.  Yes, there are all kinds of ways to grieve.  I’ve taught many of them and I’m sure you’ve read your share of books on how to grieve.  But my desire today is not to give you a formula but a perspective on grief.

In a nutshell my perspective is this; I want you to believe and know for sure that while you grieve, God grieves with you.

You see, grieving is the mechanism that has been placed in our hearts to allow us to get through the difficult, scary, and undesirable pains of life.  And trust me, life can be one big pain…know what I mean?

It has come to my attention so much recently that life hurts.  Pain is a part of our everyday existence.  We might do all we can to not feel the pain, but if you’re honest with yourself, it’s a part of you more than you wish.

I know that each of us would rather have a life that was a little more joyful than sad.  We all desire to be happy and fulfilled.  But for some of us, it’s really hard at times to allow ourselves to be happy.  Happiness has a tendency to escape us on a daily basis and to find joy, contentment, and peace – well, they just sometimes don’t show up.  We are feeling the pain and grief that comes with it and we just want it to go away.

There might be someone today reading this blog and you’re saying to yourself, “Pastor T, what do I do?  I’m not getting over the pain.  My grief is too great to bear.”  Again, without giving you a formula, I would hope you would hear my ideas.  One, I want you to know that God understand.  Secondly, there are many of us who understand.  And third, you need to understand.  Understand that it’s normal to grieve in life, even in the Christian life.  No matter what you might have been taught or what someone might be telling you right now, grieving is a way for you to heal.  And when your grieving begins to subside, I believe you will once again see your God.  He hasn’t gone anywhere.  He’s around even when you doubt it’s true.

I have no great words of wisdom for you today nor would I be stupid enough to think that this one little article will help you overcome your pain.  I just wanted you to know that there is a God who loves you in your time of pain and that he will not turn his back on you while you sort through the difficulties of life.

I know it’s true.  I’ve lived it.